Sunday

 It’s been a heavy few weeks for me. Medical limbo will drive a sane person nuts. This morning my humanity started counting my losses. Let me tell you it’s not my finest moments. I got to church, and I just got honest. I don’t have answers. I don’t know if I will get them. I’ve not felt my best for a while, and I’ve tried to suck it up, buttercup. My body finally staged a coup. After a few discussions, I was recommended a book that has opened the floodgates of my tears. I might need an ark the way I’m going. I’ve hidden from the world. I’ve hidden from God even if you can never hide from Him. When you’re at the Thanksgiving table telling what you’re grateful for, I might just thank You for taking back control from my human hands. I mentally fried. 

The Rx from my therapist and every doctor is physical therapy followed by rest. Move then stop. Seems opposite to everything I’ve ever learned, but this year is teaching me how much I don’t know. Life will humble you if you don’t learn to humble yourself. 

I’m learning to actually smell the roses and sip the coffee. Eat the cake. 

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